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A special thanks to Nutz for putting together the vast majority of the FAQ... an act that was far and beyond the call of duty. Congratulations on being awarded "Most Improved" 2003!
       
1.   In wondering what I should bring for my first trip to Turkey Run, I've been illadvised to "Not worry about it".. I now know that I should have worried about it... WHAT DO I BRING TO TURKEY RUN?
2.   This is my first time at Turkey Run... Do you guys camp? Otherwise, how do I book a hotel room?
3.   Who's responsible for this whole Turkey Run thing?
4.   I can't come until Saturday, is this okay?
5.   Is Turkey Run something my wife is going to enjoy?
6.   Should we do the 4, 11, or 15 mile kayak trip?
7.  

I am intimidated by Jovan and Scotty Berger's "1 off" deal rotaion! What can I do? (concerning the Spades game)

8.   Who is Mr. Z. and where is he?
9.   Do you have room on the grill for these vegetables?
10.   My girlfriend's folks are out of town and I'd really like to invite her this year, what'd'ya say?
11.   I'm not sure, how about we run up that hill?
12.   I forgot the cups and plates in the cabin, a mulleted family grills nearby, and my only bartering tender is the heralded cevapcici on the grill. What can I do?
13.   I've been bestowed the honor of a TR invitation for the first time this year but I fear the nickname that awaits me. Where do I find the courage?
14.   I remember John started talking about something, but that was 10 minutes ago, when will this story end and why does it even exist?
15.   Can I afford Turkey Run?
16.   I don't get it, a sophisticated website for Turkey Run, the same place where we wear wife beaters and discourage showering?
17.   I recently received a demerit at TR? Is there anything I can do to redeam myself?
18.   What kind of food is served at Serb Fest?
       
     
1.   In wondering what I should bring for my first trip to Turkey Run, I've been illadvised to "Not worry about it".. I now know that I should have worried about it... WHAT DO I BRING TO TURKEY RUN?
   
 

Here is a quick list of essentials you'll need to take care of your personal affects at Turkey Run:

  • A pair of old battered hiking shoes. Anything that will give you traction, ankle
    support, and can withstand mud and water. In other words, don't expect to hike
    in socks and sandles!
  • Old shorts that can get muddy and won't tear from friction with an unexpected tree branch.
  • Old pants, long sleeved shirt and/or jacket . (The air often gets brisk at night)
  • Acquatic sandles for the canoe/kayak trip
  • Checkbook for payment on the last day of event
 

Wife Beaters are provided for the men at Turkey Run. There are several menu items that are fully communal. Reference the menu for detail. Food and beverage above and beyond these items are to be brought on an individual basis. Prior to the weekend a "shopping list" is disbributed dividing responsibility for the communal items as well as a base supply of alcohol. Those who are new are usually asked to contribute cash towards the purchase of the Serbian Cuisine. Bring a blank check - Participation in communal items has historically run approximately $60/family (slightly higher for long-time attendees). For simplicity, distinction is typically not made between single attendees and families.

 
   
2.   This is my first time at Turkey Run... Do you guys camp? Otherwise, how do I book a hotel room?
     
 

We have camped, but only once - in August 2001... Now, based on the fact that by now you should at least know that Serb Fest occurs on Memorial Day weekend each year, you should immediately be asking, "What were you guys doing camping at Turkey Run in August??" - That's something you can read about HERE. Aside from Turkey Run 2001 Observed, we generally do not camp. At Turkey Run State Park you'll find Turkey Run Inn, which consists of a Hotel/Lodge building with traditional hotel rooms and 8 "cabins" immediately adjacent to the Inn. Each cabin consists of 4 hotel rooms with 2 double beds, a bathroom, & TV. There is a door linking pairs of rooms which would be utilized if someone in the Serb Fest group is occupying a neighboring room.

If you're new to Turkey Run and would like to book a room for the upcoming year, GOOD LUCK... Rooms must be booked 2 YEARS in advance for Memorial Day weekend! The Serbs have been booking rooms this far in advance since 1988 when upon attempting to book rooms for Serb Fest 89, learned that TR Inn was all booked up! Each year, the founding members each book an extra room for new attendees. You may also elect to share a room with an individual or couple whom you know. Never the less, if it's your first year, I recommend booking a room for 2 years out - even if for some insane reason you're unable to make it, you an always cancel the room, but you're better safe than sorry!

Now, if you'd prefer to pitch a tent (not the kind in your pants), you're certainly welcome to! While Turkey Run State park has it's own campground next to the park, we recommend Cherokee Village Campground, less than a mile from the park. We caution you though to consider implications of being intoxicated and having trouble getting back to the campground. It's always seemed like a better bet to keep the group within walking distance of the gathering site.

 
     
3.   Who's responsible for this whole Turkey Run thing?
     
 

If you're new and asking this quesion, you're probably thinking this is just something a group of us guys have been doing for a few years.... This question can be answered 1 of 2 ways... The partially answer is that John "Jovan" Zelenkovich is more or less responsible for your soon to be first experience at Serb Fest. But he's only responsible for what we like to refer to as the "second generation" of Serb Fest. His folks along with as many as 20 other Serbian families have been gathering at Turkey Run on Memorial Day weekend as long ago as the mid 1970's. The original founder of Serb Fest last atteneded in 1998 and today only a small group of 1st Generation attendees make it to TR - most of whom have been coming since the mid 1980's. In 1996, Jovan who had been attending with his parents since 1986, began bringing his own friends to TR. The second generation of TR attendees has grown from there. Scott Berger, the first official non-Serbian ambassedor of Serb Fest began coming in 1998 and has facilitated much of the continued growth of today's Serb Fest.

 
   
4.   I can't come until Saturday, is this okay?
     
  No problem! We certainly prefer to have everyone come down Friday afternoon for an evening arrival, but for many years, the official start of Serb Fest wasn't until Saturday morning. It wasn't until TR 2005 that the 2nd generation attendees extended the weekend 1 additional night. However, if a Satuday departure is a must, we encourage you to be on the road as early as 6:30am! I know it's rough, but consider the 1 hr time change, leaving too late on Saturday runs you the risk of missing much of that day's festivities!  
     
5.   Is Turkey Run something my wife is going to enjoy?
     
  Unless your wife is lame, YES, of course she'll enjoy TR! After all, Serb Fest is a family atmosphere - ya know, with tons of meat and alcohol... But hey, the sun is usually shining, there's the great, non-life-threatening kayak trip, great hiking trails of all levels of difficulty, and plenty of games that can be played while holding a solo cup... And if they really want to strike a chord with the veteran attendees, all she has to do is offer to slice a few tomatos and onions! She'll be treated like family!  
   
6.   Should we do the 4, 11, or 15 mile kayak trip?
   
  Every year, the unbridled excitement of the kayak trip brings some
support to the idea of an 11 or even 15 mile trip. These temptations must
be ignored, however! Stick to the 4 mile and drink up!
     
7.  

I am intimidated by Jovan and Scotty Berger's "1 off" deal rotaion! What can I do? (concerning the Spades game)

   
  It would seem fair to retaliate fast and hard with a "1 off" deal
rotation of your own, but this is exactly the lowness they want you to stoop
to and only furthers their effectiveness. Although this dealing technique
has never been proven to grant a sizeable advantage, it certainly messes
with their opponents psyque and many a victim would contend that the
advantage is real and almost insurmountable. Your only hope, my friend, is
to rely on a sharpend knowledge of the game and superior skill; fortunately
Jovan's "Balls to Wall" nonsensical bidding technique will often drag his
partner Scotty B down to the depths of bitter defeat. Good luck!
     
8.   Who is Mr. Z. and where is he?
   
 

Mr. Zelenkovich, Turkey Run Hall of Famer and father of Jovan Zelenkovich has been attending with is wife Mila since 1985. Since 2001, he and Mila have only attended once - in 2006. With Jovan's passing in 2012, its unlikely that we will see them return to Serb Fest. Their legend however is forever engrained in the fabric of Serb Fest History. Anyone whose had the pleasure of gathering around the grills of Turkey Run with Mr or Mrs Z would be happy to chat over their fond memories.

     
9.   Do you have room on the grill for these vegetables?
   
 

Be very careful when requesting grill space for non-meat items... There's some merit for a good grilled pepper, but not at the expense of delaying the next batch of cevap. If it's clear that grilling has died down for the time being, ask around, and you may be able to sneak your veggies in...

 
     
10.   My girlfriend's folks are out of town and I'd really like to invite her this year, what'd'ya say?
   
 

At one time, a non-sarcastic question of this nature might have brought you before the Turkey Run High
Council for reprimandatory action. Now a days, girlfriends, wives and families are all welcomed with open arms. Use sound judgement though in inviting your girlfriend. All we ask of invitees is that they have the personality and sense of humor to appreciate the true Spirit of Serb Fest and all of it's complete ridiculousness. If you've spent anytime at all on this website, you know exactly what I'm talking about!

     
11.   I'm not sure, how about we run up that hill?
   
 

I know we are all aging, but there comes a moment (usually no more than 3-5
minutes long) in every Turkey Run excursion when we must challenge
ourselves. Ask yourself this: has it rained today, is Olaf present, does
this hill take you out of your way for no reason? If the answer to any of
these is yes, the blood, sweat, and tears of this particular route are most
certainly worth it.

     
12.   I forgot the cups and plates in the cabin, a mulleted family grills nearby, and my only bartering tender is the heralded cevapcici on the grill. What can I do?
   
 

May I suggest sparingly offering a few of the most burnt cevapcici of the
batch in exchange for supplies. This may pain you, but there's a decent
chance they will refuse the cevapcici out of a hapless mix of ignorance and
kindness. If you can't bare to chance it or if this batch is just too damn
good, may I suggest eating straight from the grill until reinforcements
arrive?

     
13.   I've been bestowed the honor of a TR invitation for the first time this year but I fear the nickname that awaits me. Where do I find the courage?
   
 

First of all, nicknames are NOT mandatory at Turkey Run; they either happen
or they don't, you can't mess with fate. I know the Charles TR nickname of
"Chuckles" has you worried, but you can only go up from there, my friend,
fear not. And hell, Scott's managed all these years without a nickname, so anything's possible!

     
14.   I remember John started talking about something, but that was 10 minutes ago, when will this story end and why does it even exist?
   
 

There may be a purpose, but there's a good chance the end is nowhere in sight... but I feel your
pain... have another cevapcici and he'll soon forget the story altogether.

     
15.   Can I afford Turkey Run?
   
 

Yes, you can and will afford Turkey Run. The basis for this question is
solid however. Turkey Run began as a free shmorgasbord (please post proper
spelling of this word on the message board) at the "adults'" expense. As
the transition to the next generation began, however, weekend total fees
quickly grew from about $60 in 2000 to $125 in 2003... or about 27.7%...
easily outpacing an average annual economic inflation of 2.25% (see chart at
http://inflationdata.com/inflation/images/charts/air20030516.gif). At this
rate, TR will cost $16,623.71 per person in the year 2023 compared to the
value of $125 in 2023, roughly $195.06... and don't forget you may even be
married then and have to stomach a walloping one weekend cost of $33,247.42.
Kids could easily explode this number into the $100,000 range if you're
not careful. A few helpful hints: don't let Jovan wander the grocery aisles
alone, you probably don't need that nameless sauce in question, and Miller
High Life is both affordable and delicious! Aside from that, all I can say
is, save up and bite the bullet!

     
16.   I don't get it, a sophisticated website for Turkey Run, the same place where we wear wife beaters and discourage showering?
   
 

The best way to appreciate the fusion of technology and trash is to come
see for yourself. So be patient young one.

     
17.   I recently received a demerit at TR? Is there anything I can do to redeam myself?
   
 

A demerit is issued only under a unanimous decision by the founding
members and is not taken lightly. As such, it is irrevocable and one of the
most severe disciplinary courses of action. However, don't loose heart.
With some hard work, you may very well be dubbed the "Most Improved
Attendee" the following year. Remember, keep your eye on the ball and your
hand on the Solo cup!

     
18.   What kind of food is served at Serb Fest?
     
 

What is Turkey Run really all about? THE FOOD! Let's be honest, TR is a glorified Memorial Day Barbeque. The Serbian & American inspired menu is always evolving! While the menu is DOMINATED by meat products, there's surely something for everyone, even you crazy vegitarians! Here is a breakdown of what you can expect each year at Serb Fest!

       

 

 

     

 

TR ONLINE | OVERVIEW | HISOTRY | PROFILES | COUNCIL | CODE OF ETHICS

2003-2014 Turkey Run :: Serb Fest - Online

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Some things, we ask you just not question - like what led to the photo you see above.... For everything else pertaining to Turkey Run, Serb Fest, History, etc., we invite you to ask away, but check here first, for some of your questions may have asked by many others before you!